When the Leaves Are Gone. . .

It was 10 degrees Fahrenheit where I live in NJ this morning. It was bitter cold. And it felt even more bitter cold since the temperature on New Year's Day was such that I was traveling around town with nothing more than a cardigan over my t-shirt. Mornings like this are one of the things we dread most about winter. All year long most of us are either in a state of dread that winter is coming, or worse yet here, or celebrating that it is had ended and that we are back to warmer days. I didn't always detest winter as much as I have in recent years. Sure - it was not my favorite season but I was able to tolerate it fairly well. Even see some of its charm. That pretty much changed when I had my first child. She was born in the middle of February - in my opinion, probably the worst month weather-wise. It was really cold outside, she was colicky, and so we stayed mostly at home or at my mom's house. We basically hibernated until both winter and colic subsided. Subsequent winters weren't much better. Kids want to play outside, run around, go to the playground. But when its 25 degrees or colder, those activities are excruciating. Even for the kids. Ten minutes of being outside in that type of weather usually ends up in tears - at least for my kids anyway. And most of the indoor kid-friendly activities end up costing a lot of money, especially when you have more than one child, or are breeding grounds for every type of virus that is circulating at the time. I also miss the leaves on the trees and bushes, the greenness of the grass, and the smells that belong to each of the other seasons. Winter seems so bleak. And perceiving winter in this way can also make your spirit seem bleak as well.

I live about 25 minutes from the gym to which I belong. I like to drive on the side streets rather than the highway because its more scenic and, therefore, more enjoyable for me. There is one stretch of road that is bordered by woods on one side and a golf course on the other. I particularly like this road because you see mostly natural landscape. There are only a couple of houses and the golf course is mostly hidden from view by trees. It is especially beautiful in the fall. But now the trees are barren. Such a contrast to what they were several weeks ago. But a couple of days ago I was driving to the gym on this road and glanced toward the golf course. I noticed in the distance through the trees a body of water reflecting the sunlight. I was a bit surprised that I hadn't noticed it before. On the way home from the gym, now driving on this road in the opposite direction, I was able to see the water in the distance even more clearly. It was beautiful. The sun was glistening off its surface and reflecting light back up onto the trees. The same trees that I thought looked barren and bleak now glowed in the ambient light that was shining down from the sun and up from the water onto them. I realized that the reason I hadn't noticed the water before is because in the spring, summer and fall its view is blocked by the leaves on the trees that surround it. Now that the trees had shed all of their leaves I was able to see past them to the water. I was actually thankful that the leaves were gone.

This experience has caused me to rethink how I view winter. Rather than focusing on the things that winter has taken away, I am trying to train my brain to focus on the experiences that winter brings. For starters, I am going to stop thinking that I am "trapped inside" all winter long. The truth is that during the warmer months we spend more time out of the house than in it. Even when we are home, we spend a lot of time in the backyard. Since the weather's turned colder, I've really been enjoying the time we spend at home - sitting in the living room enjoying a cup of tea, watching movies or shows on DVD after the kids go to bed, having manicure or cookie playdates with friends. Spending time at home has been really soothing to my soul. The food in winter is also quite soothing. . .and delicious. Soups, stews, winter vegetables, chili, good sauces - they are all distinctly winter yet fun to cook and eat. There is even something fun about getting bundled up in a warm coat, furry boots, and cozy hat. And then there's snow. Snow is beautiful when it is falling. The world around us always seems more peaceful when its snowing. And kids love it. Playing in snow is one of the great wonders that children experience. Watching them make snow angels, building snow men, and then coming inside to dry off and warm up with hot cocoa brings me back to my childhood. And experiencing their joy and wonder is a reward in itself.

So while I'd still choose a day at the beach in the summer over a snowball fight during the winter, I am going to stop fretting about the winter. The winter holds many hidden treasures if you look for them.

How do you feel about winter? Love it? Hate it? Miss it?